18 Simple Truths Nobody Told Us While Growing Up
You know how when you were a little child you used to thinks that grown-ups have the answers to all of your questions and how those answers would in fact reflect the ultimate truth and how life should be lived? Well, what you did not know then and probably a lot us don’t know it now either, is that each and every one of us has a different set of beliefs and based on those beliefs we build our lives and our reality and what we usually do, is imposing our own set of beliefs on them.
This is a list of 18 simple truths that nobody shared with you while growing up, and it is based on my own beliefs, experiences and you don’t have to believe anything, “no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.” Buddha
1. With self love and acceptance comes real happiness. If you ask me, there is no greater gift you can give to yourself than the gift of self love.
“If you aren’t good at loving yourself, you will have a difficult time loving anyone, since you’ll resent the time and energy you give another person that you aren’t even giving to yourself.” Barbara De Angelis
2. Judgments prevent us from seeing the good in people. The moment we judge another human being, we are blocking ourselves from seeing beyond the labels we put on to these people, restricting ourselves from really knowing and seeing them for what they really are, and not for what we think they are.
3. Expressing Gratitude for the things we have will help us attract more of the things we want. Gratitude is one of the 12 activities that Sonja Lyubomirsky talks about in her book, “The How of Happiness” activity that is scientifically proven to help us achieve and attract more happiness into our lives.
“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.” Melody Beattie
4. What other people think of you is none of your business – your reputation is not something you have control over. The more people you interact with, the more reputations you get. I know, quite funny – we can’t really control what other people think of us, and trust me, this has nothing to do with being a “good” or a “bad” person.
5. There are no limits to what we can achieve, only those we choose to impose on ourselves.
“Don’t believe what your eyes are telling you. All they show is limitation. Look with your understanding, find out what you already know, and you’ll see the way to fly.” Richard Bach
6. By doing good, you would be happy, by doing bad, you will be unhappy.
“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” The Dalai Lama
7. Time waits for no one, it does not. Time passes by so fast, and that is exactly why we must learn to treasure every single moment we spend on this beautiful Earth, to be present and engaged in everything we do, for time, once gone, is gone forever.
8. Wisdom never decreases by being shared. Share your knowledge with the world, share your unique gifts and talents for it is in giving that we receive.
9. Love people, not things; use things, not people. Things come and go but people, once they’re gone, they’re gone forever and that is exactly we really have to pay close attention to how we treat everybody around us and to choose to always be kind, loving and respectful toward them.
10. Money does not equal happiness. If you love what you do, you will always find a way to earn money, but don’t you ever make money your end goal for you will never be happy if you do so.
I find the words of Wayne Dyer to really resonate with this: “When I chased after money, I never had enough. When I got my life on purpose and focused on giving of myself and everything that arrived into my life, then I was prosperous.”
11. Hard work does not equal success. We were raised to believe that if we work hard, very hard, we will become successful and we will afford many things that not so hard working people won’t be able to afford them, but that’s not always the case.
I know that it may sound a bit harsh, but I do agree with Bill Bowermann on this one:“The idea that the harder you work, the better you’re going to be is just garbage. The greatest improvement is made by the man or woman who works most intelligently.”
12. We know more than we think we do.
“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms and like books that are written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will find them gradually, without noticing it, and live along some distant day into the answer”. Rainer Maria Rilke
13. The power that comes from focusing on the things we want rather than the things we don’t want. What we focus on expands and what we resist persists! You don’t like something, don’t fight it, don’t resist it, don’t complain about it.
“You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete.” Richard Buckminster Fuller
14. Don’t believe everything you think. Every time we choose to stress about the things we can’t change, the things we can change, the things we don’t want to change, we are in fact causing even more stress in our lives, keeping us even further away from thinking clearly and taking smart decisions.
“If you realized how powerful your thoughts are, you would never think a negative thought.” Peace Pilgrim
15. Beliefs become self fulfilling prophecies and “if you treat an individual as he is, he will remain how he is. But if you treat him as if he were what he ought to be and could be, he will become what he ought to be and could be.” Goethe
16. Don’t compare and don’t compete. To compare yourself with others it’s toxic, unhealthy and damaging to your self-esteem and self image.
Constantly trying to compete with others will drain so much energy out of you and the best thing you could do for yourself is to realize that: “True nobility it is not about being better than anyone else. It is about being better than you, used to be. “ Wayne Dyer
17. Love everything, be attracted to nothing, knowing that: “attachment is the great fabricator of illusions; reality can be attained only by someone who is detached.” Simone Weil
18. It’s very healthy to talk openly about death. Why should we do such a thing you may ask? Well, because: “A dying man needs to die, as a sleepy man needs to sleep, and there comes a time when it is wrong, as well as useless, to resist.” Stewart Alsop
Talking about it and not acting like it will never come our way, will help us live fuller lives, will help us enjoy the moments we spend with the people we love even more, expressing our appreciation and gratitude toward them more often, and when the time will come for us or them to leave this planet, to do it with grace and serenity.